I Deserve It.

 (Email #2 I have sent to Walmart).

Dear Walmart,

How's it going?  It's been 36 days since I emailed you last, and 1,200 hours since someone at corporate said they would solve my problem.  To review from my last email: I keep getting phone calls from the Walmart Pharmacy in Eagan, MN.  I've tried calling their Pharmacy 3 times, Corporate twice, and writing you guys an email once.  Although I have been assured that my problem would be taken care of, this problem has not stopped.  (If you would like to read the whole email, it can be viewed on my blog http://whan-that-aprill.blogspot.com/2012/12/3000-characters-remaining.html  I am documenting your excellent customer service for the whole world to see!)

You may be thinking to yourself, "Why does this girl care so much about getting unwanted phone calls?  Everyone gets unwanted phone calls."  The problem isn't just the phone calls, my dear Walmart.  The problem is the Voicemails you leave.  Phone calls are easy enough to block.  Voicemails take so much extra effort to delete. 

Now, I'm a good person.  I try to not complain about "First World Problems."  I mean, I should be thankful I even HAVE a cell phone to delete voicemails off of.  But the other day I heard a commercial for a McDonalds Egg McMuffin, and the guy said, "You deserve it."  Now, frankly, I thought this was quite ridiculous.  I don't deserve greasy fast food products.  They are a luxury only the highest class can afford.  But that got me thinking.  Maybe there are some things in life I DO deserve.  I think one of these things is to not have to delete unwanted voicemails off of my phone.

Now, believe it or not, I actually SHOPPED at a Walmart since the last time we spoke!  I know, I know what you're thinking.  "Oh, the big red bullseye not good enough for you anymore?  Eh?"  Here's the story: My parents live in the middle of nowhere, let me tell you.  They live in Central Wisconsin where there's still K-Marts.  (Can you BELIEVE that, Walmart?  A K-mart.)  But if you want to get fancy, you drive 20 minutes to the nearest "Big City" and you get to shop at WALMART.  So my husband and I went with my parents to a Walmart! 

I didn't think I was going to buy anything, but boy was I wrong!  Your prices on small animal bedding and rabbit feed was unbelievable!  I bought the biggest size you sold!  Honestly, you might as well just give that stuff away.  $7 for three square feet of rabbit bedding?  Little Milton will be set for many years to come!  I also bought a cat hair brush because you didn't sell rabbit hair brushes.  You might want to work on that.  Milton doesn't really like the cat hair brush, and his shedding is getting out of hand.

I think you can clearly identify the problem: I'm getting these annoying voicemails and they need to stop.  You did a really swell job sounding apologetic at corporate, but have been ignoring me since.  You are probably not afraid of a little girl and her blog, but I will not back down. 

Yours, most sincerely,
April