April's Top Ten Tips to a Low-Stress Low-Cost Wedding

Planning a wedding is what you make it.  Despite what statistics tell you, a wedding does not need to cost $25,631, you do not need to invite that one girl you sat next to in art class, and you do not need to drape every surface in tulle.  Although I may not be a wedding expert, I have almost successfully planned my own, almost completely by myself, and on my own dime.  While I only spent about 1/5 of what the "average American wedding" costs, I can say with full confidence that my wedding is going to be fun, beautiful, and have personal touches.  Here are my Top Ten Tips as to how I made this happen:

1. Not Every Girl You Know is Meant to be Your Bridesmaid. I get it, you have a lot of friends.  They are all super happy to see you tie the knot.  But organizing/coordinating/dealing with 5, 6, 7...8 other women is not making it easy on yourself.  Sure, when I decided to only have two bridesmaids (three if you count my Junior Bridesmaid, Nathan's little sister) I was afraid that the world would think I was lame and friendless.  But the two girls who are going to stand next to me on my big day mean the world to me.  They planned a great Bachelorette party.  They know me and know what I love.  I'm not saying that two is the way to go.  But seriously consider who you want standing up there with you on your big day.  Don't worry about the politics of "But if I make her a bridesmaid, then I need to add So-and-So."  No.  Keep it lovely and simple.  It's better for your brains and budget.

2. Don't Bury Yourself in Flowers. To save a ton of money, I chose a ceremony location that speaks for itself.  I'm pretty sure the foundations of Nazareth Chapel would shake with laughter if I tried to outshine its beauty with flimsy flowers.  Consider this: How many weddings have you been to?  Do you even remember what flowers were sitting on the alter? 

For the reception, instead of towering centerpieces splaying peacock feathers and red roses toward the skies, I am having my aunt create simple, rustic arrangements for a fraction of the cost. 

3. Goodbye, Flavor-of-the-Month Boyfriends! This tip can be a little controversial, since wedding etiquette demands you to give all of your friends a plus one.  It's proper.  But when you're on a budget, do you really want that smelly jock your third cousin is dragging along to the reception to eat all the appetizers?

4. RSVP Online. Although my wedding invitations were elegant, traditional, and simple, we saved on postage by having all of our computer-literate guests RSVP online.  To someone more modern than myself, I would even recommend not sending print invitations at all (except to the oldies).  This will reduce the typical guest excuses of, "I lost the invitation," or "I haven't made it over to the post office yet."  Your guests are three clicks away from choosing between pork and chicken.

5. Speaking of Invitations...make them yourself.  Unless you feel like paying somebody three to five times more to do it for you.  I purchased my invitations at Michaels for $120 total.  A couple nights next to the printer did the trick.  Grab a couple of girl friends (or a reluctant mother) to tie bows and stuff envelopes for you and you're done!  I added a personal touch to my invitations by melting my own wax seals onto the outer envelopes for an extra $25.  You wouldn't believe how many compliments I received, and all for a mere $150.

6. Low-Budget Bling. I'm not going to have a wedding band.  How's that for going against the grain?  Obviously this isn't everyone's top choice when figuring out how to save money, but if anything, this tip should show the importance of questioning the norm.  Do you really want two rings?  Do you need two rings?  Are you getting a wedding band just because?  Consider other options.  My ring, for example, already has two bands built into it.  Simple, yet still symbolic. 

Also, when it comes to ring sizes and styles, less is more.  I hate to break it to some of you girls, but your ginormous diamond you're hauling around looks ridiculous and fake.  IMHO. :)


7. Say Yes to the Lesser-Costing Dress. If you know that you're doing a wedding on a budget, don't even oogle the unattainable gowns.  Remember when I said less is more?  The same rule applies to wedding dresses.  I know every girl dreams of her fairy-tale dress, but don't let the gown outshine the girl.  

8. Hail Poetry! I've been asked several times who is singing at my wedding.  Without thinking, my expression immediately becomes sour and I say something to the extent of, "Ew, nobody," which is a less graceful way of saying that we decided to leave the sappy love songs at the door.  Besides the fact that I find most wedding songs annoying and unnecessary, choosing to opt out the vocals is also one or two less people to pay.  Create a ceremony that reflects you, not what a ceremony is supposed to reflect.  Can you guess what Nathan and I are including, in lieu of song? 

9. Cheesecake! After looking at and tasting a bunch of over-priced, over-decorated, under-flavored cakes, I remember looking at Nathan and saying, "I wish we could just...I don't know, have cheesecake, or something!"  Nathan said, "Well then why don't we?"  We hadn't even considered other options at the time because everyone gets a wedding cake.  It's tradition.  Not so!  In fact, only about 50% of couples choose the wedding cake route these days.  If you and your fiance love ice cream sundaes, build a sundae bar!  It's guaranteed to be more memorable and less expensive than a white flowery wedding cake. 

10. Picture Perfect. One of the biggest wedding costs after food and alcohol is photography.  I have known couples to spend $4,500 on a photographer--the average cost is $2,000.  My advice?  Find an artsy friend with a camera who understands your vision.  If you're looking, I would recommend Sarah Fowler to you.  She's got a great eye for photography and is just starting out.  

Many couples say that the one thing you should splurge on is a good photographer.  What if your amateur misses the perfect shot? 

To that I say: Indeed, what if? 



If I could summarize all of my tips for you, they would come down to three basic thoughts: Rethink tradition, simplify, and personalize.  Not only will you make your wedding day less vanilla, you'll save big bucks that can be used toward the honeymoon!